Overcoming Illusion

Gaining Enlightenment

Overcoming Illusion

Temporary note: This essay was written a bit at a time over several years. Still working on cohesiveness. This note will go poof! when I am satisfied.

“The greatest gift, truly the only offering, we can make to this world, is to realize Being (The Self)” - Ramana Maharshi, Sri Nisargadatta, Buddha, Adi Shankara and countless ‘others.’


Overcoming illusion is as easy as 1-2-3!

1. Stop seeking.

Expecting any literature, including this essay, to reveal new truths of a spiritual nature is seeking. Expecting or desiring enlightenment is seeking, as is meditating for a spiritual reason. Likewise, believing any sort of religious concepts is holding on to that which would otherwise fall away. Seeking/desire also happens in other areas of life. Seeking is destructive to all methods presented here because it assumes an individual that must find something. As long as you are looking outside of yourself for anything - direction, inspiration, guidance, reference - anything at all, you are moving away from enlightenment. Spiritual practice is like hiring a thief to catch himself. A possible effect of spiritual practices may be to exhaust the ego which leads to surrender and recognition of the “HERE and NOW”.

Seeking enlightenment is like climbing a sacred mountain. We think we have to get to the top, but the entire mountain is sacred. Every step is the sacred center.

Enlightenment is what you had before you decided to seek it. You just didn’t recognize it, that's all. When what is here and now is second to none, you don’t need to search for anything else. Click your heels together three times; can it be that simple? It can, if you realize your only problem is that you have problematized.

You won’t become firmly established in ‘remembering’ you are ‘enlightened’ overnight. I will take continued witnessing. But eventually you will come to see, to realize, to apperceive, that simply Being with nothing added is your already-enlightened natural ‘state,’ and you will love just being so much that, although the mental add-ons and psychological assessments may continue to pop up, you just won’t be interested anymore, just won’t believe any thoughts anymore. And rest in Being.

“The Self is always the Self and there is no such thing as realizing it, ‘attaining it.’ Who is to realize what, and how, when all that exists is the Self?” - Ramana Maharshi

The ego´s desire of becoming, to have some meaning, to be liberated, to be enlightened is the obstacle to realize yourself. Enlightenment is a present fact, not a distant goal.

You don’t have to quit your religion - just put it aside (thoroughly!) for the purpose of this exercise - and be patient! Or, at least, consider this:

I Am that which I Am. God is only (or exclusively) that which God is. God has no attributes and answers to no designations.

I Am that very I Am. God is nothing other than self-conscious existence. God is therefore the “I Am” of all. (See also Luke 17:21; the kingdom of heaven is within, and Matthew 13:33; the kingdom of heaven is the yeast in the dough.)

The eternal Lord is none other than Being and Awareness. Awakening from the ‘sleep’ of duality, or enlightenment, means directly realizing that all that exists is the One Primordial Self.

This is why some get lost in spiritual or religious realms.

Belief is ... useless in enlightenment. You can ‘believe’ you are free & enlightened all you want - sort of that ‘fake it till you make it’ attitude - or believe that believing it will somehow ‘make it so,’ or at least, accelerate the process. But true enlightenment is not ‘cause-&-effect’ and nothing the ego can do - thinking, studying, practicing, mimicking, acting on it, believing, disbelieving - will ever ‘cause’ enlightenment. Believing something is that poor perennial substitute for actual Reality.

You are already perfect. The illusion is the idea that something you do will “make you” something other than what you are. You think you’re setting out at dawn to find your quarry, but the “hound of heaven” has pursued you this whole time. The idea that we’ll be enlightened one day causes us to plant enlightenment in a future moment and pretend we’re preparing ourselves for it. There is only Now. Enlightenment is not an event that takes place in ‘time’ to an ‘individual.’.

You are already a sage. You are already infinitely wise. How? Because there is no actual self-enclosed “you.” Only Awareness. 

The most important thing is to realize that what you’re looking for precedes your search for it.

Ramana Maharshi was fond of saying: "Those who wait for a lime to ripen will be disappointed." Meaning, there is no future event greater that now.

“The Self is always the Self and there is no such thing as realizing it, ‘attaining it.’ Who is to realize what, and how, when all that exists is the Self?”

You impose limits on your true nature of infinite being, then weep that you are but finite creatures. You take up this or that spiritual practice to transcend these non-existent limits. But if your spiritual practice assumes their existence, how can it help you transcend them?

Insist you are in bondage, and you are in bondage. Insist you are awake, and you are awake.

- Ramana Maharshi

Always remain you. It’s simple. Any child knows. This awareness doesn’t age, doesn’t become a product of the world. The person you are for others is a conditioned product of the world, a social identity — but not that which you are for yourself, that which is your center.

And that’s all “enlightenment” is — this centering. Return to center. See from where you are seeing, rather than imagining yourself from without. The term "elightenment" is best retired. Awakening/enlightenment are a vague concepts, interpreted by each teacher in their own way based on who knows what experiences they may have had.

Give up believing you are ‘separate’ from Reality
Give up believing in higher and lower selves
Give up believing you are ever not in your natural state
Give up believing your mind’s thoughts. All of them.
Give up believing in enlightenment…

…Then, you are ‘enlightened.’

Steps to enlightenment:

Step 1: don’t worry

Step 2: be happy

Like space, happiness is there already. We just need to get rid of the junk that’s obscuring it. This is the only remedy. If you do step 1, step 2 is automatic

It may happen that anatta (see below) may precede freedom from seeking/desire.

Said by Pausha Foley:

Enlightenment is not a human state. It is not something a human achieves. It is not a mastery of the human mind, it is not a human insight, human thought, human emotion amplified and increased to some super-human levels.

Enlightenment is what you are. Enlightenment is what you are not in a sense that “we are all already enlightened, only we don’t know it yet”. Enlightenment is literally what you are if you are enlightened, the same way that human is what you are if you are a human.

To ask “how can I find a teacher that will direct me to the path of humanity” would be absurd, wouldn’t it? You don’t need a path of humanity - you are human. Your life, your human life, your human existence, is a path of humanity.

Enlightenment works the same way: those who are enlightened are enlightened the same way you are human. Their lives, their existence, is a path of enlightenment.

Your life is your path of being you. Being you is the only path available to you. You can’t walk a path towards becoming a cat, a fish, or a rabbit. You can’t become something other than what you are. If you are a human, your life is a path of humanity. If you are enlightened, your life is a path of enlightenment.

Whatever it is that you are, your life is it, your path is it, and you are walking it already. There is nothing else you can do, and there is no other path you can walk.

2. Just be (Hindu). The experience you are having, which you call ordinary, everyday consciousness, pretending you're not it: that experience is exactly the same thing as it. Enjoy the aliveness. Aliveness does not need one who is alive.

3. Understand that this is it!

No angelic choirs will sing, and you will not see the face of God. Human egos don’t go away or get destroyed. They simply recede way into the background.

In the case of a direct experience of awareness, intellectual understanding is an obstacle. you don’t move from it - you overcome it. The direct experience of oneness is a direct experience of what is right now, right in this moment, an experience so deep, so complete, that you re aware of this present moment as oneness, as awareness. When you have an intellectual understanding of what it is you are trying to experience, right now in this moment you are trying to experience what you think oneness is. You are trying to experience your concept. You are not being present with what is. In order to be present with what is, you need to stop trying to think about what it is you should be experiencing, what it is you should not be experiencing, what is the right way to experience, what is the wrong way, what is unity, what is not unity, what is oneness, what isn’t. All those ideas, all this knowledge, all this understanding, you need to let go of all of it.

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Another method based on FUN!

Have fun. Best is mindless fun where you lose yourself. When you lose yourself you gain the universe: as close as the next big smile or bout of laughter. Awe and wonder can affect one similarly. This method may not seem to have "lasting effect" - after all, fun starts and ends. Those who wish to experience bliss in the absence of overt fun may try the following nothingness method. There are, however, no unenlightened individuals, so equally valid is: don't worry about it!

Are you expecting more? Just what are you expecting? Maybe you think it should be harder. If so, see below, though it's not much harder! And, of course, any difficulty is also illusory!

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Another method based on not worrying about anything at all (also fun!):

Understand that you don't need to worry about anything because you will always know what to do, because you always do.

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Here is another method based on being nothing at all: to come to the knowledge of that which we are when we have understood that, as phenomena, we are not.

Just quit give up the idea of being! (esoteric Buddhist) Understand self as nothing, not even a concept. This is called anatta. You don't have a life: life happens, aliveness happens, as if in free fall, without need of any sort of "one who lives". We are the illusion we’re trying to see through.

Without a personal self to identify with, Consciousness rediscovers its infinity. Until the personal self is seen through, we’ll always think there’s a person who has to meditate (or something) to attain enlightenment.

Watch life (watch your `interest in this essay) and your body being animated without your participation. Doing tasks while cognizing anatta allows a glimpse of Reality that complements insight from meditation. Relax: this is it! Abide in recognition of the illusory nature of self. (This gives the mind something to do - which it craves.) Then come to understand that non-beingness is the ultimate wideness. There is nothing beyond non-beingness. That is as "deep" (or high) as one can possibly go (there is no one to resist such going): the Ultimate Depth. Everything else is phenomena occurring on the screen of non-beingness.

There are no ‘enlightened people.‘ There are no ‘liberated people'. There are no ‘fully-awakened people.’ There is only enlightenment, Being, Life, This Everything. There are no “selves” trying to reach enlightenment or God-Consciousness - there is only God playing the eternal game of hide-and-seek.

One's whole perspective is (pretty much) instantly shifted by simply ceasing to assume one's existence. This is what I term the Great Change of Perspective that is the end of seeking (yes, it's that easy!). The Change can be noticed upon experiencing closed eyes. No longer is one simply staring at the back of eyelids. The ephemeral (nature of) constructed self is most easily sensed in the midst of silence."There is Consciousness along with quietness in the mind; this is exactly the state to be aimed at." Further support of anatta as the end of seeking is the powerful experience of bliss, which happens to me instantly upon cognizing anatta, in meditation or not. Bliss-blocking may be do to the energetic constriction of "I do this" or "I suffer that".

The greatest single impediment to enlightenment is thinking we already know what enlightenment is and how it “happens” to a “person.” The minute you stop believing your mind knows anything about enlightenment, you are 99% closer to enlightenment than you ever were before. Permanent Peace & Happiness can only exist when the false identity of a ‘separate person or entity’ is totally annihilated. 100%. Not intellectually. Not 99.9%. Directly, 100% ‘apperceived’ and embodied.

Wholeness can only be perceived when there is no one looking for it. This (being not) is the mirror image of being all there is or "just be", above, so it is the same. Self can only exist in the context of duality.

A friend of mine had trouble understanding non-beingness. A gentler introduction is in this instruction on Vipassana meditation, recommended by Sam Harris in his book Waking Up, and by this fellow. Sam suggests meditating with eyes open. Understand, after some experience, that observing rising and falling, or more accurately, knowing rising and falling, does not require one who knows.

Another angle (of being nothing) is to do nothing at all: sometimes called silence. This is, perhaps, best begun by laying down, then, before sleepiness sets in, be aware of doing nothing at all. Do not breathe: breath happens. After some time, a thought might happen: continue doing nothing while thoughts rise and fall. An itch might be scratched, again, while doing nothing. Finally, life goes on, while doing nothing. This event may be repeated until a cognitive structure is built that mirrors the non-activity/silence quality of self. Paradoxically, perhaps, this is the ultimate aliveness. The division between what we do and what happens to use is arbitrary.

Give up.

Quit.

Surrender.

Give up trying to let go.

Let go of trying to surrender.

Surrender the idea of quitting.

It is good to have a bit of a ritual (hey, I'm autistic - I'm expert on rituals!) where one, at the same time and place most days, can enjoy non-beingness. Part of non-beingness is not experiencing desires, so a ritual obviates the need for even the desire of non-beingness. This ritual doesn't have to be long, in fact, it is best kept short. And rest assured, what is happening is the Real thing due to the Ultimate Depth quality previously described. Note also that this is not meditation because meditation requires being (one who meditates).

What happens by all methods here is that a neural structure is built by which one can recall the knowing of that which is Real.

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Another method based on Mindfulness meditation:

Mindfulness works best when there is no doer involved. For this to happen - give up doership! Understand that a mindful outlook happens, then (especially when life get's hectic) does not happen. This impermanent quality is what is: understand that ego-self has nothing to do with it. Abandon, for the moment, at least, any notion of free will: mindfulness is now happening or not happening, with no one making it happen or not happen. It is best to not worry about mindfulness. That way, when mindfulness happens, the spontaneous (without cause) nature of this event is obvious.

Mindfulness practice is being fully present in all that happens. Actions are not just noted, but are noted automatically, by nobody.

Mindfulness meditation is watching one’s thoughts and sensations in a dispassionate way. Who is watching thoughts? After some experience with mindfulness, one may realize that the basic thought, which spawns others, is I am. So mindfulness can lead to observing the I am on the screen of I am not. This blissful void, from where the “I am” thought is known, is home - abide there.

A mindful outlook can also be brought to bear on Ramana Maharshi's suggestion to dive into self. Not being the doer of this can, I have noticed, cause the breath to momentarily cease. The memory formed of this can then be recalled as a reference point of illusion-free attention. This is were the Ego and the Infinite meet. In fact, I feel that this sort of directed attention may decrease the psychic distance from mind to void: from individual identity to universal identity. Life appears as a magical sort of sparkle.

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Whatever your practice is, it’s good enough.

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Self-enquiry, suggested by Ramana Maharshi, may not be useful for overcoming illusion. Rather, find out who it is who meditates. Better yet, give up "doing" anything, especially the sort of meditation intended to overcome illusion. Trying to control thoughts or feelings is equally ineffective because there isn't anyone to control them. Awakened people seem to come in two varieties:

Those who never meditated prior to awakening.
Those who did, but later insisted meditation had nothing to do with it.

What is postulated, then obviated, here, may be called the Great Change of Perspective (the G-C-of-P), or, equivalently, one's apparent awakening. Even a soft spot for any sort of religion or doctrine can hinder the G-C-of-P. Awakening experiences are rarely about religion. The great majority of the experiences occurred unexpectedly in a wide variety of everyday settings, to people who knew nothing of spirituality or religion.

An awakening event can be disorienting due to having to “find your footing,” (or more accurately, loose your footing in this illusory world and re-establish it in Reality.)

Horizontal transcendence can be part of the G-C-of-P

Guru caution.

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Some may question why I, a nobody, should have the audacity to hold forth on spiritual enlightenment. I am a shy electrical engineer, too shy and autistic to be a teacher or desire fame of any sort. In my defense, I state here that what is suggested above is a natural, common experience.

Mindfulness

Mindfulness means maintaining a moment-by-moment awareness of our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment. Mindfulness Meditation is a practice of being fully and attentively present in the moment. Some think this must be done seated on the floor, which is silly. One can be standing (limited by fatigue), or lying down (sleepiness may set in), though a seated position may be best for extended (more than a few minutes) sessions. There are reports of negative reactions to mindfulness meditation, especially with group meditation.

If you meditate for 20 minutes a day for 2 or 3 months, most likely you will only feel its calming, expansive effects during or right after meditation.

As you continue for 12 months, 2 years, 5 years, maybe sometimes naturally falling into longer periods of silence, your ‘identity’ shifts from thinking you are the noise in your mind - all it’s plans, judgments, desires, moods, etc. - to…”What’s that watching all that noise, but isn’t another thought itself? Just the Witness? Just Awareness?”

Mindfulness and anatta really come to the same when one becomes mindful of being nothing. Anatta is to mindfulness as melody is to rhythm. Mindful observation of anything does not require one who is mindful. All it requires is the mere faculty of knowing. Meditation should not stop when one overcomes illusion. You may think you’re meditating to attain enlightenment, but you’re meditating because enlightenment has already claimed you. Mindfulness is a prerequisite of anatta. In my case, sitting in my garage (the only quiet place), I was sitting, mindful of the feeling of self. Every time "I" would experience something (any quality at all, even space), I would view that objectively, from the vantage point of nowhere (perception does not require one who perceives). Then something happened: I became freshly (but still objectively) aware of my heart. Strong bliss happened. It has yet to stop.

Stilling the mind does not lead to enlightenment. You are really unbound and actionless, self-illuminating and spotless already. The cause of your bondage is that you are still resorting to stilling the mind. We believe we’re meditating to attain a special state, and this is our barrier. The true meaning of meditation is simply…Being. Everything is a state of mind except enlightenment. Everyone who meditates long enough can experience the silent mind, but this does not mean he/she is enlightened. Meditation, though, can be a wonderful adventure. Waiting for the bus can be a similar adventure. The path to greater awareness leads through your heart, which is the only “real stuff”. ‘Enlightenment’ is not an event, practice or attainment that happens in time to and ‘individual. Enlightenment is realization of the illusion of separate individual. When identification is consciously dissolved within the absolute consciousness, life remains.

You cannot “reach” enlightenment, anymore than a fish can “reach” water. You are already in enlightement, already swimming in it now. ‘Spiritual Awakening’ and ‘Enlightenment’ are just human-ego concepts.

Ramana Maharshi; "There is neither creation nor destruction, neither destint nor free will; neither path nore acheivement; This is the final truth. Brahma Satyam Jagot Mithya - sankrit for "Brahman alone is real; the world is an appearance; ego-body-senses are illusory. Avadhuta Gita: I have no birth, no death, and do duties; I've never done anything, either good or bad. I'm purely Brahman, beyond all qualities; How could either bondage or liberation exist for me?

The egoistic “self,” also known as the identification with this body or mind, cannot destroy itself. Cannot get rid of itself. The mere trying - all ‘seeking,’ practicing and ‘becoming’ - can only, by their very nature, reinforce the illusion that there is a ‘separate someone,’ separate from Being, who has anywhere to go or anything to attain.

There is no such thing as the ego. The ego doesn’t exist. It’s just a concept, a label, assigned to what “we” think are “our” individual choices and actions, when in fact there really isn’t any “we,” and “we” are not the Doer. There is only the One Self. Or if you prefer, Being, Consciousness, pure Awareness, the Emptiness, God. It doesn’t matter - all those are just conceptual labels, too, just like ‘ego. We all should feel delighted that we have this magnificent chance to be the eyes of the sublime Universe through which it observes itself. It is only your mind that has you convinced of the illusion that you are not already in enlightenment (which is your natural state). Our true nature is consciousness; all-embracing emptiness; the silence of the heart. - Ramana Maharshi

About Ramana Maharshi. Here is an interesting story of the death of Ramana Maharshi's father. Absolutely normal life. Not disturbed with the drama of illusory story of individual anymore..

Any form of meditation that allows you to detach and dis-identify from the constant barrage of thoughts, and just be aware of your primal Existence, of Being, of Silence, is applicable - using a mantra, focusing on breath, or Witnessing/Allowing (doing nothing at all) meditation is recommended.

Go back to that state of pure being, where the ‘I am’ is still in its purity before it got contaminated with ‘I am this’ or ‘I am that.’ Your burden is of false self-identifications—abandon them all. Profound peace will follow. Enlightenment is the realization that happiness is independent of conditions. Self-realization is what happens when it occurs to you to be happy.

Suffering happens only when the mind does not want to experience what it experiences. In awareness suffering doesn’t happen. Without denial, rejection, refusal, suffering doesn’t happen. In awareness, every experience is. No experiences are refused nor rejected.

Our true nature is happiness. It is not wrong to desire it. What is wrong is seeking it outside when it is inside.

- Ramana Maharshi

The key to enlightenment is attention. To discern and abide in the ever-present Reality is the true attainment. All other attainments are like powers enjoyed in a dream. Sri Ramana Maharshi, Reality in Forty Verses, Verse 35.

Enlightenment is about knowing who we are. When you disidentify with the “I” that thinks and worries, you are free. To do so, turn your attention to the Consciousness in which “I” seems to appear. This is the Self.

When the “non-dual” understanding is truly established in daily living you do not even wonder about those things. Its absolutely natural for Self-realized being to be fully absorbed in the pure knowing. He is pure knowing, he is the “I”. He is absolutely independently in peace with or without objects. He is absolutely self content. The “I” is all there is. He is the whole… - Ramana Maharshi

The views above are not original with Ramana Maharshi. Such is explained clearly in the Ashtavakra Gita.

Just be not is my favorite approach to overcoming illusion. The self is a disruptive, false, and, as such, unnecessary metaphor for the process of awareness and knowing: when we awaken to knowing, we realize that all that goes on in us is a flow of “thoughts without a thinker.”

Awareness of that from which all things flow is everyday awareness expanded to include that. We are not the victims of life, we are life itself. One energy colored in million ways.

“This “me” that I’m trying to tame, or make more peaceful, or more enlightened, is nothing more than a random collection of thoughts & experiences floating by, that don’t actually belong to a “me” – there is no separate location or me here – they’re just the One Reality being Itself. No need for me to work at “getting out of the way;” who would get out of the way of what? What is needed isn’t effort, but attention.

There is really only one who isn't enlightened: This is the one who seems to show up, the instant we think there's a problem.

When you're not, you're everything! I most often notice bliss when I am not, which equates to silence.

Truth can never be found in any elaboration. Truth is always prior to any elaboration or add-on. It can’t be conveyed in words because it’s prior to words. It can’t be known by experience because it’s prior to experience. Every elaboration only breaks the stillness in which alone the truth is known. This is what it means to “look within.”

There are no levels of attainment. Illusion is not overcome gradually, though insights that may be dependent on this will occur over time. Possible insights:

1. First you see yourself as okay, and the world as deprived (in need of fixing). That’s the separated state.

2. Then you see the world as okay, and yourself as deprived (in need of fixing). That’s seeking.

3. Then you see both the world and yourself as deprived. You see pain and suffering in you and you see ignorance in other people. That’s self-realization/awakening. In the deeper stages it manifests as compassion, but it’s still not the end.

4. Ultimately, you see both the world and yourself as perfect in their imperfection. That’s enlightenment.

Overcoming illusion may be a shock or may trouble one temporarily, depending on one prior beliefs. It is also useful to note that habits of mind change only gradually, and unevenly. Those who have overcome illusion are not outwardly perfect, in fact, such people may irritate and even be addicted.

The first illusion to drop away is the notion of selfhood which (slowly in my case) ceases to dominate the psyche (accompanied by less mental chatter). Once selfhood truly disappears for even a second (most likely while doing a boring or simple task), the grip of illusion has been loosed: welcome home!. The notion of no-self then occurs while doing slightly more complicated tasks, or while mentally listening to a well known bit of music. Once you passed the threshold, there is no more ‘you’ to worry about losing jobs/every thing or gaining wealth or wisdom or any thing [these are all things of the world that you leave behind the threshold together with any ideas/concepts/belief you had about anything, including who/what you are. Those who have overcome illusion do not judge everything they experience. They do not judge. For such people there are no judgments. There is no good and no bad, no right and no wrong. Everything just is.

Most people get stuck in the non-dual awakening. They have no idea at that point that there’s more. many of the spiritual awakenings and “enlightenments” are actually an escape from one’s trauma — not different from how alcohol and drugs and work and other addictions are used to escape trauma.  as long as you have the mind awakening — the non-dual awakening — you are in dissociation, not integration. It’s a hard awakening to wake up from. Whenever enlightenment is spoken of as no-mind, no-self, losing mind, transcending mind, getting rid of mind, or ego, or self - that is the ego talking, not enlightenment. It is the mind talking, not enlightenment. It is the self talking, not enlightenment.

Some people reach a certain awakening and call it ‘the end’. Usually because “there is no one here anymore” yada yada. This is fine. Unfortunate for them, though.

When the real awakening of the heart occurs, it is seen that there is no hierarchy - everything is the ultimate. Everything then appears equal, for everything is equally The Divine. Everything (everyONE) deserves love.

Volition is best not considered as causal: Anatta happens due to a modification of attention such as fascination. These moments of clarity may appear to increase in number and duration.

Everything that is alive regards itself as a "self" with consciousness. The definition of a person is where you look from. All of these views are correct. “We think we are bodies having consciousness. The reverse is actually the truth. We are consciousness having bodies.” said Sri Nisargadatta.

“I” is the eternal here and now. There is only the divine, whose light shines as the absence we call “the present.”

It’s like a hole in the fabric of nothing, but it’s not evil at all. It’s infinitely self-giving and infinitely retiring; it never even appears.

Then, in sort of a resulting cascade, one sees less of separate individual selves (souls) walking around. Now one can really see that there is no such thing as an unenlightened individual (corollary: the real, deep-down you is the entire universe). Blame, guilt, purpose, and karma no longer make sense. Right versus wrong, and the right-left fight over morality are seen with clear-headed dispassion.  Pain loses it’s sting (the sage no longer identifies with his suffering), death is no longer scary , and it is only now. There is eternal nothingness (not eternity) with momentary self and without self.

Everything is constantly so amazing in the midst of anatta. I mean, all this stuff! All this animation, all this life! It's such a trip to be watching life go on, watching meditation happen, even watching gasps due to sudden temperature change in the shower (autistic sensory issues).

Much ado, particularly in Eastern spirituality, is made of "non-attachment". Devotees invoke "neti, neti" (not this, not this!). Usually implied is attachment of mind to concepts. It is true that preoccupation with concepts tends to obscure that which is Real. But it is the mind's nature to latch onto concepts - so let it latch onto anatta. Mindfully watch this happen, knowing that mind is not self. Meditation with closed eyes is simply to sit (or lay...) with eyes closed. Do not suppress thoughts. Do nothing: do not even breathe or suppress breath. Ramana Maharshi's suggestion to "first: find out who it is who meditates" is accomplished with the perspective of anatta. Meditation with eyes open is simply to be, again while doing nothing else.

Pursuing the notion of diving into self (as suggested by Ramana Maharshi), "I" was, for years not "doing it" mindfully: not watching the diving. That is perhaps the most sure-fire way of coming to understand "this is it": there is, after all, no phenomena to be found as a result of diving into self. All "phenomena" is "what is". This diving is, after all, secondary to quietness of mind, achievable via anatta.

Some proclaim self as witness (observer). Is it? Who is watching the witness? The witness is appearing, or being, on the screen of non-beingness. It is from there, beyond the reach of concepts, that we know being witness, that we perceive the prior sense of self.

Ego is not the enemy, because in reality, there is no such thing as ego. Ego is a phantom. The false sense of a psychological self is as much a part of Creation as the unified sense of No-Self, and each has their place. We say, “The ego is an illusion.” It is, but technically it's a self-delusion.

A fun little approach is to, immediately upon laying down, say to oneself “this is it”. Knowing that after that final imaginary “t” sound, there is only awareness which is it. “It”, of course, is that awareness without an object of which mystics speak. The memory of this may be recalled as not having been produced by any sort of volition. All action and thought and story telling rests in that awareness. Arrive at the other shore by knowing that this (anything that is perceived) is not self.

I have found bliss to be different than most think. I experience bliss as a thickening of the air, as though I am swimming is a sea of divine love/oneness with all (I am atheist). Sometimes, though, this spills over into a more overt high, similar to the experience of cannabis. Bliss can co-exist with any emotion, though negative emotions tend to get washed over with bliss, so they never last long. I am most likely to experience bliss when I am aware of anatta. Tony Parsons has often spoke of presence. Bliss can meld into presence. Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

Some believe that keys to insight are more likely, or at least possible, to be found in ancient texts, the more ancient the better. Truth was the same then as now, but communication was tedious at best. What texts survive are those preserved by the powerful. Nondual teachers have no need of power or of proselytizing. What videos we have of the modern sage Ramana Maharshi are grainy and taken as though he was uninterested. And he wrote almost nothing. Contrast that with the crystal video revealings of Tony Parsons. Only now do we enjoy a surfeit of illuminated text and video. But books and videos can only take on so far.

Many teachers labelled spiritual will claim that gains somewhere are inevitably balanced by losses elsewhere, sometimes called the zero-sum game. A valid reason for stating such is that there is no one (no individual souls) to enjoy gains or suffer setbacks. The enlightened perspective is that nothing is wrong. Nothing is broken. Enlightenment does not fix the mind’s problems, instead it makes it clear that there are no problems. Getting back to consensus reality: This concept is pernicious, and basically not true, no matter where it is found, be it politics or new-age mysticism. I mean, why not that most (bodies who believe they are souls) "people" agree that now is better than what we agree was 10 years ago - 20 years ago. Maintaining our charade as separate beings: go forth and do great and wonderful things!

Don't drink alcohol. Be real. Make the most of your brief time in the sun. Be an optimistic nihilist. Avoid money as a prime motivation. Finally, have fun: enjoy the seasonal celebrations.

“Life is… not about counting the losses and the lost expectations, but rather swimming, with as much grace as can be mustered, in the joy of all of it,” Leisa Hammett